Saturday, September 22, 2007

THE BEST NIGHT* EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright. So. Cousin Megan asked me to walk her home at 3 in the morning from work. she works in the cougar catering, and she had to make all the food for the game tomorrow. So i decided that if i was staying up until 3 to walk her home, i was going to make it one amazing walk.
I got the guys on my floor together and told them we were becoming neenjas. yes, pronounced neen-ja. i was really surprised how many of them were willing to stay up until 3 to do this crazy thing. so during the day a few guys went to DI (utah's goodwill) to pick up some good ninja costuming. we all looked freaking sweet. haha.

At about 1 in the morning, we gathered to start making the plan. Mike and mitch have a cartoon map of the campus that we used in planning. I put up some post-its on the map and left blanks for people to kind of sign up for spots and stuff, then once everyone got their spots (there were at least 15 kids invlolved in this epic), we sat down and planned all the logistics of who was where and when and i had everyone meet back behind may hall down the stairs from the marriot center for the last epic battle. so we had to plan all of the logistics so that once a ninja was killed it was able to get to that spot without being seen again. It worked perfectly.
Jackie, megan's friend and my HC date, said she'd go to pick up megan with me, so i called her at like 230 and woke her up and she came, so it was very good. i wore grey pants, black underarmor, and a REAL samauri head band that said in japanese Number One. haha. perfect. oh yeah and i am only wearing socks. haha.

so i get to the wilk with jackie and we get megan and both of them just think i am dressing up for fun. We walk by and see an unknown person on a bench reading a newspaper. just as we are about to walk by, he lowers the paper and we just glare at each other. he then stands, throws 3 paper ninja stars at me (which i block), then jumps over the bench and i follow him, doing a summersault over the bench. we then insue on a previously choreographed fight. I beat him, and turn to the girls as if nothing happened and say lets move on.

Next, i fight two unnamed ninjas and beat them and cause them to roll down the hill to the library. it was a sweet fight. the girls wanted to go take the masks off and see who it was, but i told them it was not the way of the ninja. lets move on. haha. this movie isnt a good one. the other ones were tho!

NOTE: VIDEOS WILL BE UP LATER. I HAVE TO EDIT THEM TO MAKE IT EASIER TO SEE MY SICK NASTY NINJA MOVES. i have been practicing for the past 3 days to be honest. haha.

next, another unnamed ninja jumps out of a tree near the tanner building and we have a big fight there. some ninja is wearing a wetsuit inside out with a nice mask on. its great. i beat him, and the girls get their phones out to take pictures. i told them the roads were dangerous and we must keep moving. this one is a better video.

We then cross the streets to the tanner building where two more unnamed ninjas are waiting. we didnt plan a fight; they were just blocking the way so we could go another route back so we could have more fights. haha. but we improvised a lot of stuff because the girls just stood there and wanted to take pictures when in reality their lives were in grave danger. have a look. oh and the run at the end is our trademark neenja run. classic.

Next, we run accross the parking lot and go up the spiral bridge, where i fight 3 more ninjas. of course, i put them down.

later on up the bridge, we see two mysterious men wearing normal street clothes and backpacks. i say 'whats up boys' as i pass, and they immediately start shedding their clothes and they were wearing neenja clothes!! what a shock. i then fight them. one of their cell phones falls out and as i am walking away from the carnage, megan picks it up and starts trying to figure out who it is. (these girls are in our ward so they could happen to know some of the unnamed victims, but could not for the life of them figure out who these neenjas were. good work on keeping identity concealed!) so his phone falls out and megan picks it up and looks at it. i walk back and say it is not the way of the ninja, take the phone, pull on chad's elastic pants and throw it in there. haha. they werent going back for that phone. and we moved on.

Now this whole time, i had my personal stunt photographer shooting these videos. he left us as we walked by the marriott center, aparently to change batteries. but the girls caught on and thought it must be some huge last fight or something. and oh they were right. we walk down the stairs and all of a sudden mortal kombat starts blaring out of a window on my floor. note that it is now about 345AM. i then jump down over bushes instead of taking stairs, and every ninja had been hidden and they just swarmed and we had a huge fight, highlighted by me crouching into a ball and then yelling and kinda jumping upward and putting my fists in the air and all the neenjas flying back. job well done. except for one, who threw is sword at me, so i grabbed it and stabbed him. punk.

overall, id say this is my favorite night* at college. the asterisk is there because this all actually started at 1 in the morning and it is about 5 now, so i need to go to bed. needless to say, the girls loved it, the guys LOVED it, and we are doing it again. soon. I think that i could honestly become a criminal mastermind after how perfectly this plan worked out. i give myself one big pat on the back, and my neenjas 3 pats each. haha.


** there are no names in here because i do not know these neenjas**


Camie said...

Taylor--you must be related to my brother Jared with your crazy ninja shenanigans! IT sounds like a big production and I'm sure the girls were happy to be a part of it all! Thanks for sharing--I'll definitely look for the videos and maybe show them to my daughter if I think they aren't too scary!

Tiffany said...

That is hilarious! I made my husband come and read it and he loved it as well. Too funny.

sassparilla said...

you are jj. how embarassing.